2 thoughts on “What is a Catholic family anyway? Busting common myths

  1. K
    Kari says:

    Thank you for pointing this out to women of the community. I feel I get judged a lot for having only one child. Some have openly suggested that I should have more, while others it’s more of a look or a side-comment that hints as much. We have recurrent pregnancy loss. I have 4 babies in heaven along with the one blessing here on earth who I cherish with all my heart. And yet, we keep trying, month after month, in hope that God will see fit to give us more children. There is nothing that my husband and I want more than to raise a big family. Bearing the loss, sadness, and the disappointment of RPL is hard enough, without feeling like I am being judged unworthy and rejected by the women of my faith, who are supposed to be lovingly supporting me. Pregnancy and infant loss must be considered when we Catholic women look over each other and make their assumptions. Bearing children or not bearing children is not always a choice we as individuals have; sometimes it is entirely in the hands of God.

    1. Y
      Yvonne says:

      Kari, Thanks so much for your post. You are in such good company in both Sarah and Elizabeth, who I’m sure will continue to pray for the souls of all those who presume to unseat our Lord from the judgement throne. We live in such a judgy culture by default, that I often struggle to keep it Christian myself. It took some time, but becoming involved in the Moms’ group and with the greeters in my parish I thankfully met those kind, quiet, humble women who would not even think to question your family dynamics and are just present with their love and support. A model we can all strive for! I hope you find the support you need. Nobody should have to bear this kind of loss alone. Sometimes God has plans for us so very different from what we expected, and the perspective and strength of supportive sisters is so essential as we strive to discover the beauty and blessedness in this personal gift of God to us. Regardless of “choices” (what a terrible tone this word has taken these days), the life of every child, born or unborn, is always entirely in God’s hands, and so is our fruitfulness with the children we rear. And I applaud the article too, for so many reasons. As a mom who decided to allow her son to attend a public high school, I was appalled at my own urge to justify my decision to every person who asked what school he was attending. We made so many sacrifices to send him to Catholic elementary, but I am satisfied with our decision to send him into the world in this way when he is still living under our roof. Rolling eyes notwithstanding, we have enjoyed many teachable moments as he encounters a worldview which is now so very different from the Kingdom we are anticipating. Yes, there are definitely trade-offs, but we can be confident God will refine the ore we offer into finest gold. Soldier on Catholic Moms!

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